They can all get fucked just stay true to you
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its that feeling right there, you try to choke it back but it always fights its way to the front again. your heart hurts, you can’t breathe. your head tells you you can’t take it anymore, another part of your brain tells you not to give up. you’re shaking, you want to cry but the tears don’t come. you want to scream but your mouth doesn’t move. you sit there, numb. images of razor blades and nooses enter your head, your shaking hands start to sweat with longing to hold these items, press them against your cold useless skin and stop everything from hurting and spinning, trying to transfer the pain somewhere else and go somewhere you can stop hurting. but you can’t do it can you? even though at times you hate them, your family need you as much as you need them. so you clasp your hands together and screw your eyes shut, screaming inside for health and for something to come along and wash the pain away. you sit there, wondering whether things will be this way forever, knowing they probably will. you’re drowning, drowning, and there’s nothing you can do. you can’t swim away. you’re drowning.
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